Is it really a small small world? - A social experiment
In the last week of August, I walked into a jazz club in Chicago called the Green Mill. It was my last night in the city. I had been there along with two of my colleagues on an official meeting for 4 days. At the end of the 3rd day, we finally got the time to head out without the worry of 8am meetings.
I expected to have a lot of fun. Any place that plays live jazz and serves cocktails is a sure shot recipe for it. What I did not expect was to meet Reese.
Reese started talking to me with a joke. A sarcastic one. A Chandler Bing kind of joke. Just the kind of joke that gets me tickled. I quickly checked him out from the corner of my eye, (you know, in a way that the other can't tell that he's being checked out. Not sure how good I am at that kind of thing but yeah that was the attempt) and decided to crack a joke back. (Yes, he looked nice enough for that) As an appreciator of good jokes, I know my jokes weren't so good but he laughed. Needless to say, we got along. Next thing, I knew, we were talking more. Soon we were dancing to the live jazz music. I was in no mood to leave his side but I was conscious of my colleagues who i had conveniently left out of all the fun and it didn't feel right. Also, I imagined all the stories they'd tell everyone at office back in Mumbai about how 'Pooja did the livin da vida loca in Chicago'. They don't know me well to know that this was not the usual thing with me. I have never made friends with a stranger at a bar. I think I said that to Reese too and he was like, "that's cos you have arranged marriage". I was like "no..that's not what i was saying.." and he went "oh yes..u do... haha..". Well, we laughed. It was fun.
I was pretty sure, this was just an everyday thing for Reese. He's a natural charmer. I know that kind. My instinct told me not to get carried away. But to just relish the moment. It didn't even cross my head to ask for his number or his last name. I was pretty satisfied with what I already had. Not only did I find a partner to dance with, but also a partner who was loads of fun to hang out with. Just for the record, he was not the only guy who asked me to dance with him that night. There was an old gentleman who had asked me earlier. I had accepted to dance with him too. Though that was more proper. We danced for one song, at the end of which he said "thank you". I was happy just with that too. To dance with anyone at all was more than I had expected to be able to do anyway. So, to get to dance with the Reese too, was for me, yummy icing on the cake.
Feeling very happy, at the end of 3 songs(dances), I told him that I'll need to join my friends now. He said that was okay. We hugged. I think I kissed him on his cheek, and I was on my way.
I got back to the table my colleagues were at and said to them "I kinda cut that rudely short but needed to be done..". Their reaction surprised me.
They were like, "why would you do that??". I responded in jest, pretending to be shocked at their question, " hello..are you guys kidding me? what if i woke up without a kidney? or a tatoo on my butt?" (yes i watch way too many movies and way too many sitcoms). One of my colleagues said, " he's quite a dish". I was like, " really? I didnt even get a proper look at him. I turned to look at him and that's when the band started playing "papermoon". I told my colleagues that I was going to dance with him on just one more song and be back and they were surprisingly encouraging about it. But, he was now dancing with one of his friends. Sigh. That song is one of my most favourite songs of all time.
The song got over, I went back to say another bye to him. This time I think he kissed me on my cheek. Happy, I was off.
In the cab home, my colleagues told me how they were very sure I would stay back and that I would tell them to carry on. I just laughed at them but in my mind, I began to think about what a great time I had had and how much I liked him and how rare it was to meet someone like that anywhere in the world. I decided I will keep in touch with him.
It didn't seem to bother me at the time that i didnt even know his last name. I just waited to get back to my hotel where I could access wifi and find him online. I got back to my room at Hotel Omni and ran a quick search for Reese, chicago. then reese perth. Then the green mill page, which I found and 'liked'. Next day, I thought it'd be a good idea to place a post on their page to help me find Reese. So, I did. This was what I posted to the GreenMill page:
Then i left WIFI zone to go for a swim in the hotel pool and later walked down to lake Michigan for a dip in the lake and still later shopped on Michigan avenue. Little did I know, I had somehow posted that post on my own Facebook page!! meaning i had just reached out to my 800 odd friends which include potential boyfriends to help me find this guy called Reese.
when i reach the airport later that evening, to catch my flight back to Mumbai, I see personal messages from friends I havn't been in touch with for several years, encouraging me that it is possible to find this guy. Even my mother messaged me, "looks like this Reese left quite an impression on you. Que Sera Sera". I was overwhelmed with all the support I was getting from everyone. I went back and re-read my post to see what about my post made people see this in a romantic light? I could have been looking for him to say, return money i owe him? There was barely anything in my message to suggest that i was love-sick and longing to see this boy again. Why then, was everyone looking at this like that? I found it amusing as I found that the world was way more romantic than it claims to be.
A few days pass by, I was back in Mumbai and back at Ogilvy. My worst fears had come true. How "pooja did the 'livin da vida loca' on facebook was a popular topic of discussion" and i had me alone to blame. I would explain that I was drunk when I made that post. I would explain that it's not romantic. It's just that he's a nice guy that I'd like to be in touch with. But people just viewed me as a girl in love. One colleague sent me this song to listen to saying that it was the song I'd relate to. I enjoyed the song but no, I did not relate to it.
But I still wanted to find him. I remember him and my time with him, like it was happening right now. It was so real. How could nothing be left of it but the memory? When there is no good reason for it to be like that? I had found him. I wanted to keep him - in the capacity of being in touch with him.
Everyday, during free moments I would find myself searching online using all kinds of key words. I'd see pictures which confused me and realised I was forgetting his face. I began to get used to the idea of never finding him. But not my friends who kept searching and sending me pictures of people from the net, asking me if this was him. I'd look at the picture and say "no..thanks for looking.. heh" And I'd get a "why couldn't you just ask him for his number??" People were feeling far more passionate about this than me myself. I had one friend make me draw out a poster that she would get put at the green mill, hoping to make Reese, see it when he came down next. Yes, I did draw a poster.
One guy sent me the number of the owner of Greenmill. Yes, I did make a phone call.
Anyhoo, gradually, the whole thing began to lose fizz. But I still had the odd person ask me, every other day"did you find him?". I'd say, "no..but it's not like I am lovelorn..it's ok" to which people would respond with lines to the effect of "dude!! dont say that. this is what romcoms are made of".
Then on 14 Aug 2015, 3 weeks since that dance at Green Mill, Swati Shivshankar from my office sends me a picture with the message, "pooja is this him???" and I look at the picture expecting to disappoint yet another romantic. I was in for a surprise. She had found him. When I saw his pictures, I knew I had not forgotten his face at all. This was him.
His name is spelt R-H-Y-S.
We are in touch now, like I had wanted. I am not really sure what Rhys thinks of all this. He seemed surprised that I had actually found him.
So, I guess the answer is, yes, the world really IS a small world.
I expected to have a lot of fun. Any place that plays live jazz and serves cocktails is a sure shot recipe for it. What I did not expect was to meet Reese.
Reese started talking to me with a joke. A sarcastic one. A Chandler Bing kind of joke. Just the kind of joke that gets me tickled. I quickly checked him out from the corner of my eye, (you know, in a way that the other can't tell that he's being checked out. Not sure how good I am at that kind of thing but yeah that was the attempt) and decided to crack a joke back. (Yes, he looked nice enough for that) As an appreciator of good jokes, I know my jokes weren't so good but he laughed. Needless to say, we got along. Next thing, I knew, we were talking more. Soon we were dancing to the live jazz music. I was in no mood to leave his side but I was conscious of my colleagues who i had conveniently left out of all the fun and it didn't feel right. Also, I imagined all the stories they'd tell everyone at office back in Mumbai about how 'Pooja did the livin da vida loca in Chicago'. They don't know me well to know that this was not the usual thing with me. I have never made friends with a stranger at a bar. I think I said that to Reese too and he was like, "that's cos you have arranged marriage". I was like "no..that's not what i was saying.." and he went "oh yes..u do... haha..". Well, we laughed. It was fun.
I was pretty sure, this was just an everyday thing for Reese. He's a natural charmer. I know that kind. My instinct told me not to get carried away. But to just relish the moment. It didn't even cross my head to ask for his number or his last name. I was pretty satisfied with what I already had. Not only did I find a partner to dance with, but also a partner who was loads of fun to hang out with. Just for the record, he was not the only guy who asked me to dance with him that night. There was an old gentleman who had asked me earlier. I had accepted to dance with him too. Though that was more proper. We danced for one song, at the end of which he said "thank you". I was happy just with that too. To dance with anyone at all was more than I had expected to be able to do anyway. So, to get to dance with the Reese too, was for me, yummy icing on the cake.
Feeling very happy, at the end of 3 songs(dances), I told him that I'll need to join my friends now. He said that was okay. We hugged. I think I kissed him on his cheek, and I was on my way.
I got back to the table my colleagues were at and said to them "I kinda cut that rudely short but needed to be done..". Their reaction surprised me.
They were like, "why would you do that??". I responded in jest, pretending to be shocked at their question, " hello..are you guys kidding me? what if i woke up without a kidney? or a tatoo on my butt?" (yes i watch way too many movies and way too many sitcoms). One of my colleagues said, " he's quite a dish". I was like, " really? I didnt even get a proper look at him. I turned to look at him and that's when the band started playing "papermoon". I told my colleagues that I was going to dance with him on just one more song and be back and they were surprisingly encouraging about it. But, he was now dancing with one of his friends. Sigh. That song is one of my most favourite songs of all time.
The song got over, I went back to say another bye to him. This time I think he kissed me on my cheek. Happy, I was off.
In the cab home, my colleagues told me how they were very sure I would stay back and that I would tell them to carry on. I just laughed at them but in my mind, I began to think about what a great time I had had and how much I liked him and how rare it was to meet someone like that anywhere in the world. I decided I will keep in touch with him.
It didn't seem to bother me at the time that i didnt even know his last name. I just waited to get back to my hotel where I could access wifi and find him online. I got back to my room at Hotel Omni and ran a quick search for Reese, chicago. then reese perth. Then the green mill page, which I found and 'liked'. Next day, I thought it'd be a good idea to place a post on their page to help me find Reese. So, I did. This was what I posted to the GreenMill page:
I made friends with this lovely guy called Reese last night at Green MillGreen Mill Cocktail Lounge. Could somebody please help me get in touch with him? He is tall. Australian. An IT consultant. Been living in Chicago for about 9 months. Loves Jazz. Well, that's all I know about him.
— at Green Mill.Then i left WIFI zone to go for a swim in the hotel pool and later walked down to lake Michigan for a dip in the lake and still later shopped on Michigan avenue. Little did I know, I had somehow posted that post on my own Facebook page!! meaning i had just reached out to my 800 odd friends which include potential boyfriends to help me find this guy called Reese.
when i reach the airport later that evening, to catch my flight back to Mumbai, I see personal messages from friends I havn't been in touch with for several years, encouraging me that it is possible to find this guy. Even my mother messaged me, "looks like this Reese left quite an impression on you. Que Sera Sera". I was overwhelmed with all the support I was getting from everyone. I went back and re-read my post to see what about my post made people see this in a romantic light? I could have been looking for him to say, return money i owe him? There was barely anything in my message to suggest that i was love-sick and longing to see this boy again. Why then, was everyone looking at this like that? I found it amusing as I found that the world was way more romantic than it claims to be.
A few days pass by, I was back in Mumbai and back at Ogilvy. My worst fears had come true. How "pooja did the 'livin da vida loca' on facebook was a popular topic of discussion" and i had me alone to blame. I would explain that I was drunk when I made that post. I would explain that it's not romantic. It's just that he's a nice guy that I'd like to be in touch with. But people just viewed me as a girl in love. One colleague sent me this song to listen to saying that it was the song I'd relate to. I enjoyed the song but no, I did not relate to it.
But I still wanted to find him. I remember him and my time with him, like it was happening right now. It was so real. How could nothing be left of it but the memory? When there is no good reason for it to be like that? I had found him. I wanted to keep him - in the capacity of being in touch with him.
Everyday, during free moments I would find myself searching online using all kinds of key words. I'd see pictures which confused me and realised I was forgetting his face. I began to get used to the idea of never finding him. But not my friends who kept searching and sending me pictures of people from the net, asking me if this was him. I'd look at the picture and say "no..thanks for looking.. heh" And I'd get a "why couldn't you just ask him for his number??" People were feeling far more passionate about this than me myself. I had one friend make me draw out a poster that she would get put at the green mill, hoping to make Reese, see it when he came down next. Yes, I did draw a poster.
Anyhoo, gradually, the whole thing began to lose fizz. But I still had the odd person ask me, every other day"did you find him?". I'd say, "no..but it's not like I am lovelorn..it's ok" to which people would respond with lines to the effect of "dude!! dont say that. this is what romcoms are made of".
Then on 14 Aug 2015, 3 weeks since that dance at Green Mill, Swati Shivshankar from my office sends me a picture with the message, "pooja is this him???" and I look at the picture expecting to disappoint yet another romantic. I was in for a surprise. She had found him. When I saw his pictures, I knew I had not forgotten his face at all. This was him.
His name is spelt R-H-Y-S.
We are in touch now, like I had wanted. I am not really sure what Rhys thinks of all this. He seemed surprised that I had actually found him.
So, I guess the answer is, yes, the world really IS a small world.
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